Comedy is tragedy plus time.

Shut up, Amadeus. It's awesome.

::Celio

FIFA World Cup 2006 Final
starring German idiots, an angry Frenchman, and a dumb Italian

Linesman 1: So, what're you doing after the game?
Linesman 2: I dunno. D: Probably going to go celebrate. D:
Linesman 1: Sweet. Me too -- oh no, why is everyone freaking out?
Linesman 2: Um. I don't know.
Zidane: I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY. DDDDX
Materazzi: I AM SO DEAD. ;_____; MY LUNGS. MY COLLAPSED LUNGS. I CANNOT GO ON.
Linesman 1: Uh.
Linesman 2: That Italian says Zidane tried to kill Materazzi. DDD:
Linesman 1: That monitor agrees!
Linesman 2: Cool. Red card!
Linesman 1: Totally. D:

///

Okay. D: So Italy decided to cheat. That's what Italians do. Haven't you people bent to stereotypes and watched The Godfather part 2579293572390? The Italians are fucking masters at this, so I'm really not suprised that they cheated the entire World Cup. D:

What the hell, linesmen? DX I hate you.

EDIT:

WHY DO GERMAN PEOPLE INSIST ON NOT TRANSLATING SHIT. I HATE GERMANIC LANGUAGES AND THEIR INABILITY TO USE LATIN ROOTS SO I CAN AT LEAST FIND COGNATES IN THE GODDAMN LANGUAGE.

sklghsdlkghsdl;hsdl;hgasl;hkg

::Celio

AHAHAHA.

Oh my good Lord in heaven, that has got to be the funniest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. I was expecting some sort of screwup from France, but nothing like this!

Well done, Captain Zidane! Vive la France indeed! I'm sure all of the people in Paris are shouting your name now! "Zidane! Zidane! Zidane, the great Captain, the legendary player, the wonderful Frenchman, the stupid asshole!"

What were you thinking? "Let's make a total ass of myself in my last ever international appearance by headbutting Materazzi into the ground! I'm sure that will go over real well with my adoring fans!"

Marvelous! Well done! You made Italy's last ten minutes or so golden, now, didn't you? Italy can hold its head high and Materazzi can go home with a big stupid grin on his face because he was the man who broke Zidane's class.

You potentially cost France the World Cup, how does it feel?

Oh, that was beautiful, I must say. Why watch a comedy hour when you can turn into the most celebrated sport in the world and watch legendary players act like four year olds?

Very classy, Zidane. Very good example for your country.

EDIT:

My god, Materazzi falls like a girl.

::Celio

Watching teenagers fight is so amusing.

::Celio

I guess I can voice my approval of France just this once because Ronaldo is a fucking sobbing pussy who apparently can't be a man about losing a game to the French. D:

::Celio

I thought I would get into the patriotic swing of things (because that's what I do when I'm bored and feeling vaguely American) and state that, for the record, I still hate France.

( Close your eyes and think about what you've been missing in your life lately. It could be a person, pet, place, thing, occasion, feeling. Anything at all that you miss dearly. )

::Celio

Okay. :D+

So my choice for the World Cup lost. :D Apparently Brazil decided to STOP PLAYING FOOTBALL IN THE QUARTER-FINALS, WHAT THE FLYING FUCK! JESUS CHRIST, YOU PLAYED LIKE A BUNCH OF FUCKING DUMBASSES. WERE YOU NOT AWARE THAT YOU WERE IN A FUCKING GAME OR DID YOU THINK THIS WAS JUST A PRACTICE RUN AGAINST YOUR MOTHER? STUPID! STUPID STUPID STUPID. YOU LOST TO FUCKING FRANCE. WHO LOSES TO FRANCE? PUSSIES LOSE TO FUCKING FRANCE.

That's all. <3

::Celio

You Are The Sun

You represent the best of life - vitality, success, and and truth. You tend to have a strong, centered, balanced personality. Inspiration and discovery are your fortes. You are very mentally strong. A talented mind, you tend to excel at math, philosophy, and music. Your fortune: As well as you have done in the past, the future is going to be filled with more success. A new creative project is coming your way. Feed it, and it will grow into something huge. Great riches, recognition, prosperity, or happiness is coming your way. And it's possible that a fantastic vacation, or a new baby, is coming sooner than you think.

I win!

The Americans lost to a poor African country. Well done to Ghana, but my god, the Americans looked like kicked dogs.

::Celio

( Describe your funniest childhood memory. )

Tell me I'm an insufferable moron, now, will you? D:! Well, fine, bastard.

::Celio

Ignoring the fact that I have not played football since I was fifteen, and also ignoring the fact that I have not followed football since eighteen, I am going to voice my opinion anyway, because that is what I do best. :DDD

Uruguay is a completely useless country. Do any of you even know where Uruguay is? D: I'm going to be the bastard and assume no, you don't, but for those who are not in AP, IB, Amadeus, and... not the little rabid football freak in the corner, Uruguay is directly underneath Brazil in South America. It's a retarded country that no one cares about because they suck. D:

Ending that geography lesson, we'll also assume that everyone on my friends list is ignorant of South America. We'll assume that all you know is that they are very good at football and drug trafficking, and not much else. D: With that said, the only conclusion you can draw is that the referee was stoned. Three red cards in one game, two of them being completely useless? What the hell, fuckwad? You're going to get yourself suspended again.

On that note, what the hell was FIFA thinking even allowing him to ref this match? Did they think "Hm! After suspending him in 2002 for bad calls, let's give him another chance, because he's improved in the last four years! :DDD" What dumbasses. The ref deserves to be shot, not suspended.

I dislike the American team. I think they're all stupid assholes who have no idea what they're getting into by even bothering with the World Cup. I don't think Americans have any sense of football and don't deserve to be entered into the Cup. D: But even I can admit that that was shoddy reffing by the Uruguay dickhead.

You've all seen this 2107520937532097 times on your friends list, but I decided to be annoying and spam it one more time. :D

I'm supporting Brazil because my home country has its head too far up its communist ass to bother having a decent football team. D: And... I'll be damned if I support America. *_*

[/useless post]

::Celio

The kid next to this computer is playing chess online and muttering something about Russia.

::Celio

I told you so.

::Celio

So, in the celebrity news lately, Scientology has been on the rise in the celebrity community. D:

Everyone knows how crazy these people are and I have no doubt that they're the next Al Quaeda, with their golden rugs and millions of servants to brush their teeth for them because they can't do it themselves.

Apparently, some people object to this religion in general, and even better, Tom Cruise has joined the vicious ranks after being a closeted scientologist for years. D:

Fuck all of this. D: You want to know who the true crazy motherfucker is?

Samuel L. Jackson.

Want to know why?

This is why! Have you seen that site? D:< He acts like a total psychopath. No one can take that movie seriously, but he seems to be all gung-ho about the damn thing.

This man is clearly out of his mind. D: Therefore, forget Tom Cruise. Forget Scientology. Kill Samuel L. Jackson instead.

The movie is going to suck anyway. D:

This has been inspired by my insane boredom and lack of people to cure it.

::Celio

( Perception: Generally speaking, how do you think others perceive you? )

So, Memorial Day is tomorrow and I am really failing to care. D: I mean, I love America and all, but it doesn't appeal to me to sit on a front lawn and go "AMERICA RAWKS!" all night.

I'm not going to sleep because of your country. Damn.

There's really no point to this entry. I just wanted to waste time.

::Celio

My first LiveJournal cut. Aren't you all excited? I certainly am.

( A letter to myself! )

Hee hee. That was almost fun! I'm starting to actually enjoy LiveJournal. Maybe I'll even, uh, use it more than I intended.

:: Celio

Clearly, I have lost my mind and gone to absolute and total hell.

I'm not sure exactly what I'm supposed to be writing in this little box, but I quite like the little box that is my LiveJournal, so I guess I'll write it in whenever I feel like it. Really, this entry is only so my layout won't look completely stupid. I'm also forcing Amadeus into having one so his doesn't look stupid.

I do not like stupid.

Oh my god, the stars look like my best friend's girlfriend.

:: Celio